What if?

Well another year is coming to a close.  I was fortunate to experience some new highs as well as some new lows.   I simply call that, a life in balance.

I continue to be amused by folks that send their “Christmas letters” to once again inform the world of their perfect lives! 

It’s easy to assume in a world of social media that you are the only one “not” living a perfect life! 

…I can assure you, they are not and neither or you! 

If you have known me for long you may have heard me say “normal people are simply people you don’t know well!”

Soooooooo give yourself some grace…no one’s life is all cake and ice cream!  Even if they want you to think it is!

In order to move forward consider its “ok” to have “issues” in your life.  Tomorrow is another day and soon this year will be over and it’s time to “wonder” once again “what if?”

What if… your life was entirely up to you, not contingent on what others are expecting or needing from you?

What if…whatever you attempted you will eventually succeed!  Would you continue to try?

What if…this is your life to live and not "performance based" in order to achieve salvation?

What if…you knew no matter how hard you try you cannot change someone else’s destructive path unless they agree to be part of the plan?

What if…the act of giving is repaid tenfold and perhaps even more?

What if…money was always available when truly needed?

What if…there was a good reason for all things to happen the way they do?

What if…the way to change the world relied entirely on the change you create in yourself?

In 2015 I wish to you and all the folks that I am privileged to be associated with, a wonderful New Year.

And my answer to “What if?”  is simply “Why not!” 

It’s a whole lot better to believe in order to achieve!

NobleOne

Do you seek the message or the messenger?

Why is it that 8000 people attend a particular Church and 200 attend another, yet both are preaching the same message?  Clearly the messenger matters!

For some, a manual will do just fine; others require it placed in a pretty package and delivered with a big red bow.  The information is the same however the packaging is different!

I would love to give my son a manual that he can refer to whenever he needs to consider the wisdom of his next move.  The message he needs to hear is clear, however no matter what delivery the message takes it doesn't always get through.

Wisdom is always readily available at our finger tips; however we often are not ready to receive it.  It first needs to be sought after.

You need to know that you need to know!  Think about that for a minute…

If everyone needed to know the same things at the same times, perhaps it would be easier. Life comes at you at different speeds and no life is the same. 

In my life I have faced some pretty large obstacles.  For me, the answers were not always clear or available.

Questions and answers come in all shapes and sizes.   Some folks simply read from the “good book” every day and find most answers there, while others are still seeking on their death bed.

Yesterday I discovered the best way to sync my smart phone to my smart truck and found the answer in the manual in the glove compartment.  I also need to lose 10 lbs. gained over Thanksgiving and couldn't find that answer in the same location.

I just googled “losing weight” and received this response...42,300,000 results (0.43 seconds) yet I am no closer to losing 10 lbs. than I was a few days ago.

Some solutions require a better package just like some messages are learned from different messengers!

Are you seeking a message or a messenger? 

The persistence of the pursuit will always lead to the best answers.  

NobleOne

May the force be with you!

…and also with you! 

Who doesn't remember those lines from the epic Star Wars Trilogies?  What kid didn't wish to be like Luke Skywalker and have the ability summon the power of the force inside of you!

Now with the new Star Wars movies coming out a whole new legion of kids will learn about the power of the force!

I love the thought of quieting your mind in order to summon a connection that makes you even better than you already are!  You now become the best of the best and you never miss your target!  You are constantly aware of what is going on around you as well as everywhere else you care about! 

The ability to summon your inner force would allow you confidence over every situation always knowing the who/what/where and when to move forward. 

In a simpler sort of way I believe the force is available to all of us.  If you are honest in your pursuits and passionate about the process, the force is in you!

Do you believe in your force?  Or are you relying on someone else’s force to get you where you need to go?

A few folks in my path understand the connection and vibrate at a slightly higher frequency than most of us.  The force is strong with them!

What is the result of tapping into the force?

Happiness!

May the force be with you!

NobleOne

How often do you think about your Dash?

There's two dates in time that they'll carve on your stone

And everyone knows what they mean, what's more important

Is the time that is known in that little dash there in between

(Garth Brooks Pushing up Daisies)

When you attend a close friend’s funeral you often consider their dash and perhaps you consider your own!  What will be your foot print?

Consider this, how many people today understand you completely?  After your gone do you think they will get it right?  

Most likely “No.”

Sometimes people’s perspectives baffle the hell out of me.  I can only imagine how that might be amplified or forgotten when I’m gone.

Frankly I rarely consider my dash and the reason is…I’m too busy trying to figuring out today!  When I plan, I often get it wrong.  When I pay attention, I get it right!  

How about a plan to make that dash truly stand for something!   I want people to simply “smile” when they see my dash.  A life well lived! 

As I have talked about in past blogs, I am not a fan of how most funerals are conducted.  Perhaps we would start something new called Celebrating the Dash!

The funeral would primarily be a celebration of the life that has just come to a close.  The focus would not be on salvation or the salvation of those attending.

The purpose would be to put the proper stamp on a life well lived. 

Don’t dwell on your dash; work on your life one day at a time.  

Celebrate today as if your dash could end tomorrow. 

NobleOne

1957 – 20??

Come on over for a "feed" and don't bring a fork, bring a shovel!

Yesterday there was a “feed” going on at the end of my street!  Four guys and a few of their buddies warmed up everything from collards, whole hog, chili, venison, shrimp boil, smoked chicken, oysters, clams, and I’m sure some other stuff! 

I was invited for two reasons, I own a big grill and I volunteered to bring the beans, and mind you not just any beans, but the “best beans on the planet.”  At least that was the recipe calls them!

Steve Wozniak (Apple co-founder) recently spoke at a local forum and proclaimed what made him happy was not fame and fortune but three things that begin with “F.”   Family, food, and friends …and there could be one more “F.”

On either end of the road I live on presides two great cooks.  One is Willy and the other is Billy, and I refer to them as my bookends!   I have learned a lot about cooking “big food” from these guys and feel fortunate that I have paid attention and embraced the passion.

A few weekends back my organization cooked for close to 4000 folks.  Over 300 lbs. of pulled pork and enough sausages and pretzels to make anyone wearing lederhosen smile!

I think there is a bit of magic in a gathering of good folks celebrating eating good food in abundance.   I have never enjoyed handing my plate to someone else to put food on it.  I prefer to walk up to a large display of awesome food and use large utensils to scoop up chucks of phenomenally tasty consumables! 

Portions simply don’t exist at most of these large get-togethers.  The folks that are doing the cooking do it because they love to cook and know how!  They are not there to profiteer, only to share great food with great folks.

I have to agree with Wozniak, true happiness does reside with great friends, food and family!  You can make up your own mind whether you need more than that! 

NobleOne

Whoa! Someone listened!

I got up this morning knowing that today is the day to write my blog!  I pay attention during the week seeking topics to spew about and this week, bone dry!

I fired up the laptop and read this post by a young man that lived with us a while at Sherwood Farms. 

Today I am writing my 75^th blog and I dedicate it to "Will" aka Billy Berry!

“Life sucks quite often. Sometimes it's just for a day, sometimes even longer, but at least you're alive, which means you have all of the power you need to turn it around. My pops once told me if I put positivity out in the universe then the universe will eventually give it back.

And, as usual, he was right. Thank you for your boundless wisdom, Pops. This moment on I swear to no longer be a part of the problem, but to be a part of the solution”

Billy was one of the neighborhood kids on our street.  When his Mom passed he had no where to go and was basically on the streets as a lost teen!  We took him in and he lived at our farm for over a year. 

Billy has known tough times and faced more than his share of demons however you see him at the Pungo 7-11 and he brightens up your day!  Good on you Billy for “getting it” early.   

I will enjoy watching you grow old!

I have always had something to say.  When I learn new things or understand the world just a bit better I can’t wait to share! 

That’s why I write this blog and why I wrote Normal to Noble.

I am thrilled to say that a few have listened to my free advice and for whatever reason it worked for them. 

Some folks invest in stocks and others in Real Estate.  I have decided to invest in people and feel very fortunate to have made many deposits! 

So excited to see a return on my investment!

Priceless!

NobleOne aka "Pops"

You want amazing? Put in the time!

I was reading about a birdwatcher on the Eastern Shore that dedicates her days and hours to observing and counting hawks and raptors that fly down the Eastern Shore.  She commented that often people remark “I never see the cool birds”.  Her response “you have to put in the time”.

That remark got me thinking.  How many times have you heard a comment like that?  I can equate it to surfing…”you should have been here yesterday”.  The reasons good surfers get good waves is because they study the surf every day.  When a swell is on the way, they know about it before everyone else, including most amateur surfers.  They put in the time!  

I live in Back Bay and the water level rises and falls significantly and it rarely has anything to do with rain or tides.  People often are confused as to why!  After living here for over a decade, I know it has everything to do with the winds.  North wind means low water and south wind, high water.  I know that because I put in the time!

What confuses or amazes you?  Do you possess the passion to pursue it?

I’ve often been amazed by musicians and singers.  Working with a musician and having a son that plays guitar has allowed me to understand the investment you need to make in your craft in order to even remotely be entertaining.  

You simply don’t wake up one day and decide to be good at something.  You choose a direction and simply outlast everyone else because you develop a passion for its pursuit.  Only then will you accomplish something that perhaps will amaze others.  

I enjoy being amazed by others.  You meet these folks from time to time but not often.  Hard work and persistence are rare.

This applies to almost anything, not only to sports and entertainment.  Not everyone chooses to be amazing, however don’t be envious unless you put in the time yourself!  

NobleOne

Are teenagers a good investment?

In 2006 I had lunch with Paul Hirschbiel on a mission to explore “next steps” for The Noblemen.  I recently read a book about taking informative people to lunch because it was much easier and cheaper than hiring them to consult! 

Paul suggested we find a way to help teenagers.  He mentioned that they were such a tough investment, however everyone wants to help them. 

As I drove away from that conversation, I considered possible scenarios.  We could start a group within our existing organization and call them NobleTeens!  I immediately thought of Ovaltine (old chocolate drink) and felt there was a new brand in the making!

I started conversations with others about NobleTeens and it became quite apparent we had a new direction.  My good friend and board member Pete Reuss stepped up to the plate and joined me as my wing-man on this new adventure.  We met with a donor that directed us to start with Tallwood High School in Virginia Beach and we were off and running.

This past Friday I walked into a NobleTeen meeting at Princess Anne High School.  The teacher/sponsor was one of our own, Noblemen Jason Barefoot.  As I looked around the room from the doorway, unable to enter due to the amount of teens in the room, I spotted Gracie Booze, daughter of Chris Booze, another member of the Noblemen.  

The meeting was being run by a young lady I had never met and vice versa, yet there she was being Noble!  Amazing stuff for me! 

Earlier that same week I was startled in my truck as the person in the car next to me blasted her horn!  I looked over and it was none other than Amber Robinson, the young NobleTeen we helped with reconstructive surgery on her upper jaw in 2006.  She tagged me on Facebook later that morning and stated “it’s not every day you see the man that changed your life”!   

                                               Dr. Trey White, Amber and Miracle Matt

A young man we met at Salem High School, “Reggie” found his way early on with NobleTeens and decided to change his life.  Yesterday I read an article written in the University News at Norfolk State about him. 

                                          Reginald Land branding with his Noblemen lapel pin

So I say to you! 

Teenagers are not a good investment they are a GREAT investment!

                                                            NobleTeens @ ECSC

So invest in yours or someone else’s today!

NobleOne

Once again riding with Joe!

One of my passions or some might say addictions, is food.  I enjoy cooking it, eating it, watching it, and preparing it for others. 

Last week I cooked 300 lbs of hickory smoked pork while my buddies were roasting bratwursts and soft pretzels.  Thousands of folks were eating everything that wasn’t nail down and perhaps a few things that were!

People love our food and I love it too!  The issue!!!!  I add pounds as we Help Kids and Change Lives! 

A couple of years back my good buddy Pete Hansen and I were introduced to Joe Cross who produced the movie Fat Sick and Nearly Dead and decided to Go Green!  No solid food for 60 days. 

That exercise in extreme food discipline changed my life two years ago and it’s time to once again ride with Joe!

One pound a day goes away!  For me, there is no better plan that yields greater results!

Welcome back Joe, I missed ya!

NobleOne

Simplify!

A goal,  that until recently has never been on my bucket list!  How about you?

If someone asked me to simplify my life, I would assume that's what you do when you retire, right?  Perhaps not! 

Simplify is the title of Bill Hybels new book and a group of us are meeting on Fridays to discuss the book chapter by chapter.  I have just started the second chapter so I guess I am still a bit complicated!

In the first chapter one subject that caught my attention was on recreation or taking time away!  For me, vacations always imposed a bit of guilt in me.  Either because I was not getting things done @ the office or I was letting someone else take on my responsibilities. 

It has never been easy for me to “get away” for whatever the reasons.

If you examine the word recreation and look at its roots, the words re-create comes into focus.  That has an attraction to me and a different motivation for putting it on my schedule!

You know what people rarely say on their death bed, “I wish I had spent more time at the office.”  For me, my office is cool and rewarding however there are other major categories in my life. 

I plan to reexamine my priorities and perhaps take some time to re-create some areas in my life. 

I also will invest time into this book and examine what “simplifying” my life looks like.

Stay tuned, this could get interesting!

NobleOne

Jordan's new bike!

Today my new friend Jordan gets a new bike!  Not too long ago Jordan’s Mom discovered her son could ride a “custom” bike and set out to make it so!

Their neighbor’s son who is also special needs got a new bike and it was apparent to Tanya (Jordan’s Mom) this new adaptive bike was a life changer for him. 

Jordan tried it out and whammo!  Jordan was mobile! 

Our good friend’s at J & A Racing hooked her up with Preston’s March for Energy, a nonprofit that arranges for bikes to be customized to meet the needs of these special kids.  

However, there was a caveat!  

If Jordan gets a free bike, his family needs to purchase or arrange for the next one for the next great kid.  A “pay it forward” concept attached to this great initiative!

The Noblemen partnered with Tanya and Jordan and the community jumped in to make it a reality!

Today is the day! 

5 awesome kids get their new custom adaptive bikes!!!

Helping Kids. And Changing Lives

There will always be kids that need help however the ones that do the helping get the changed life! 

What a weekend for Nobility!

NobleOne

Candor can be painful, but productive!

Lately I am been paying a great deal of attention to “leadership.”  I think great adventures are led by great leaders and I want to be the best I can be. 

I recently watched an interview of Jack Welch, former CEO of  GE and was fascinated by the way he viewed leadership.

Candor was a phrase that screamed loudly in my head as I listened to the interview.  Simply telling the truth when the truth needs to be told.  Thinking back I have been misled by folks in my life that held back key opinions and lacked the ability to express themselves at the crucial time.

If you don’t talk things out, the truth will eventually act itself out.   In other words face the truth now because soon the truth will arise and it will be have to be handled differently. 

How many times have you witnessed someone holding back the truth in order to protect someone else’s feelings?  Truth does hurt sometimes however it hurts more later if it is not handled!

One of the more destructive ways a company or an organization can fail is what I call conducting “parking lot conversations.” 

This happens when a group of well-meaning folks get together to discuss big things and the loudest get heard and the quiet don’t speak up.  Before you know it, thinking you are on a roll and there are folks in the room completely disengaged and upset.  Unbeknownst by you at the time, however count on hearing it in the rumor mill!

As soon as the meeting is over these folks look for common ground outside of the meeting to engage in negative sentiments that eventually erode the direction of an organization.

I think there are equal amounts of introverts to extroverts however in a meeting they are not represented proportionally.  All ideas need to be heard and discovered.  Committee meetings can often be just platforms for the extroverts.  One on one meetings might be more effective in getting to the meat of an opportunity.    

Knowing this makes for better leaders!

NobleOne

To be candid I know some of you expect me to blog on Sunday mornings however sometimes it just isn't there for me!

If we build it, will they come?

“A Platform for Philanthropy” 

I have often referred to The Noblemen as a platform for philanthropy!  What I mean by this is, we offer to others the ability to help through us.  We certainly can’t do it all, however,  if we listen, learn and share we often find a solution that accomplishes great things!

If we were to “build” that platform, what would it look like?

I have often spoken of launching a restaurant called Noblemens, where philanthropy meets a good meal!  Everything we do involves a gathering, great food and libations.  What if this restaurant was centrally located and large enough to hold membership meetings not only for us but others?  It would be the “go to” spot for community platforms.  Everything from little league to linked in could have a “spot” at our table!  The staff would be NobleTeens and we would use this restaurant to provide jobs and a mentoring opportunity for our youth to learn a trade and make some money!   If you want to make something happen in Hampton Roads you meet @ Noblemens and git r done.

What if a large building became available perhaps a Church?  A large sanctuary combined with a professional kitchen and a large parking lot would be a prescription for my “vision” of a perfect platform for our kind of philanthropy.   Fundraisers and large gatherings could accomplish great things for our community.  This building would be singularly focused for giving back and discovering new ways to work together for a better life for local kids that need a helping hand.  

What these two models offer is an opportunity to take this show on the road.  Once we have established our larger platform, it will be easier to demonstrate the impact of what we do and how we go about it.  The model would provide for revenue streams that fund our infrastructure as well as our philanthropy.  Other communities could easier adopt our plan and create their “platforms” and together we expand to other places that could use a bit more Nobility!

What say you?

Do you have an idea? 

I’m listening and I believe its time!

NobleOne

I have a dream! (and it's not MLK's)

On August 29^th I turned 57 years old.  I was born in 1957, so I figure it must mean something.  I choose to believe it does!

My life changed in 1993 when my son was born, I was introduced to miracles!  I was also introduced to me.  In other words I discovered why I was placed on this earth.  To put it one more way so you understand what drives me, “I had a calling!” 

I never felt that this was God reaching down from the heavens and speaking to me, however I do feel it was a divine intervention that when acted upon started to change my world and how I viewed it. 

In 1995 I put action to intuitions and created the Robin Hoods of Virginia Beach later to become The Noblemen. 

I feel it is now time to take a next step!  Here is my vision!

I grew up in the First Presbyterian Church.  I have served as an Elder, Usher, Sunday School Teacher, and was Head Chef for our Men’s Prayer Breakfast every Tuesday for 14 years.   The concept of Church and worship is no stranger to me!

Saying that, I never “plugged in” to the essence of what most churches are meant to accomplish.  I never worshiped at Church or felt I needed to attend church to visit God.  For me God was internal and when I attended Church I felt I brought God with me.  

Why wait till Sunday to get things done?  I'm busy on Sundays! 

It was the people in our church that I loved.  The conversations and the overall goodness of other members are what continue to make me smile today!

I attended church with my mom yesterday and once again sat there thinking about how I would do it all completely different. 

Now back to vision! 

I see The Noblemen somewhat like a church dedicated to its members and open to all that desire good friends, good times, making a difference, and giving back to our community. 

I feel that people are hard wired for philanthropy however it is often tough to find that outlet.  There is a large contingency of folks that cannot or will not find that in a church. 

There are also a great deal of wonderful people that attend a church however feel that their church falls short in the category of giving and helping out the less fortunate.

I want to create that new paradigm. 

I feel that most people have needs to be met in order to get comfortable in their own skin. 

            Find a way to pay for your obligations

            If you have a family you need to work out the dynamics for making everyone happy!

            You need to believe in something larger than you! (tricky one)

If you have not figured out the first two you are going to have difficulty with the last one!  After you accomplish the first, the next two can be a combination.  

I have some “big ideas” about our future and I would love to develop a strategy that allows The Noblemen to exist everywhere we or others think it should!

These are the things that keep me up at night and drive my board crazy.  It starts with a “Vision” that builds a culture that creates an organization that is measured by the impact  it makes on others and ourselves!

It is time for me to push the envelope and stir the pot.

I invite others to jump on board to create something so powerful that we all wonder at its awesomeness! 

Here are some more considerations concerning my vision…

I don’t think someone else is going to create it for me

Lately someone mentioned we are a “hamster on a wheel” constantly challenged for our next revenue stream, that needs to stop

Others won’t invest in our organization unless we audit our financial statements

Others would like to know “what is the problem we are solving in the community?”

I plan to keep “my stamp” on this organization until someone else emerges to take my place! 

Our enhanced model needs enthusiastic support and the I feel the right vision and ideas can create that.

           

I have the passion and the drive and will “do something anyway” so why don’t we all take a step off the “easy life plan” and dig in to create a “life changer!”

Who’s with me?  

I got ideas, do you?

57 and not done yet!

NobleOne

Figure it out, don't call me!

Would you consider this good advice?  

I recently attended a Global Leadership Conference and the leader of the conference, Bill Hybels of Willow Creek Church told the story of his father putting him plane/train when he was 11 years old and telling him to go skiing in Colorado and gave him this advice “figure it out, don’t call me.”  (btw it seemed to work well for him) 

It sounded a bit stupid to me when I first heard it however it does make a good point for a teaching lesson.  If you are faced with a challenge and you have no one to call, you better figure it out, or suffer the consequences.  

Consider the times in your life when you were left alone to figure it out on your own.  Did you learn something from it?  You bet you did.  Good or bad, those experiences shape your character as well as your confidence.

When you own the experience and do not rely on others to help you get there…those are your moments. 

Perhaps giving that advice to a 11 year old is a bit extreme, however I’ll admit I am enjoying the fact that I get called less and can clearly see my son is figuring it out.

For the longest time I considered parenting a lifetime job!  I am now taking care of my parent, perhaps the responsibilities change and the duty remains. 

The lifetime job is loving both roles!  

Life is truly a circle and a grand challenge to remain balanced!  

What do you need to figure out? 

Don't call me! 

Nobleone

Why be happy?

Because it sucks when your not!  As I get ready to turn 57 I am becoming quite confident that my number one goal is to be happy and to make others happy as well!

You can’t help to smile when you see someone else that is happy.  Guess what?   It's even better when you are the one that is!

I watched a TED Talk (ideas worth sharing) recently by a teenager that decided along with his parents he would pursue an education that made him happy.  He focused on those subjects that made him feel good inside.  Those that instinctively felt right to learn about.  What a novel thought!

If I am in the position to hire someone, I think one very important criteria is…are ya happy?  It is more productive and simply a better work environment when you surround yourself with those folks that decide that they are gonna lead a happy life!

Years ago a very popular song became a phenomena when Bobby Ferrin introduced  Don’t Worry Be Happy.  Today latest sensation is Pharrell’s hit single Happy.  If you have not done so, play those songs and listen intently to the words!  

Could life be that simple?  When I set my goals many years ago I don't think being happy was one of them.  It simply wasn't my focus. 

Why?  I pay attention to the folks around me and trust me I hang around a lot of folks.  There is no motivation what so ever to camp out with those that make decisions to hurt others and inflict pain. 

What makes you happy could be vastly different than what makes me happy however that’s what makes the world go round. 

Give yourself the gift of being happy and your greatest gift to your family and friends is you achieving that goal! 

It is difficult to be happy when those close to you are not! 

NobleOne

Why I married my bartender!

When some folks leave work they often stop by a favorite watering hole to have one or perhaps two cold libations prior to going home.  Why is that?

Some folks don’t have a family at home and after a big day you just need to hangout with someone that will listen and serve you that 5:00 PM necessity!

Who remembers the lady behind the bar that knew your troubles, laughed at your stories and didn't ask too many questions?  

Who really sets the tone @ the great watering holes?

You got it…the bartender! 

…and I married mine!

And for the last 25 years I have had a best friend that listens and does her part to make things work.  She is no stranger to hard work or useless drama.  

Our marriage has certainly had its ups and downs, however year to date we both still feel we have a large life in front of us. 

I don’t claim to possess the secrets of a successful marriage, however I did put some time into my decision.

…and it turned out to be a good one! 

...is that for me? 

NobleOne